Happie deepavali!

After skool, i went straight to darsha's place. Lazy to go back home and change.
Firstly, the food is damn shiok...
1)rice
2)curry chicken
3)asam pedas
4)my fav sambal prawn
5)sambal ikan bilis
6)Acah
7)Vege
Tambah my food..
then mingled with Darsha's friend from SIM. played uno and bluff.. her friends are very humorous.... of course met my old friend hema... gosh miss the old times.. i mean i used to see her and the rest everyday in sec sch..but now..HARDLY~!! busy man.. i was wondering why can;t i meet up with them then i realise i end late most of the days and by the time i reach home is aboout 7 or 8.. maybe after all thetests and exams will meet up with them.. haiz...
just sort of came back home..tired... guess gonna doze off soon.. was at darsha's place from like 5 to nearly 10..wow!!

Me & my painful toes!!!

I am totally sick of myself getting hurt over the clumsiest thing.

Ever since i was young, i admit that i am clumsy..however it will happen only at home very often.. I have this habit of clumsiness.

When i was young, we stayed at our grandma's place most of the time.. One day i was playing hide-and seek and i closed the bedroom door so tat my sister can't catch me.. but guess wat, i put my fingers underneath the door and i forgot who opened the door and my finger got stuck.. I have hit my little toe against the side of the table so many times.. and i use to cry.. at yishun, i have played with the chairs and fell down several time.. but the most common thing is to hurt my foot...any part of my foot.. i always kena hit by the table edges..the door edges..my bed...chair... nothing new...

U noe why i blog.. coz i just hurt myself agian... it;s damn painful...

whenever i got hit, i won't look at my toes till a few hours later.. i'm scared of my blood and scar...haiz...

i never told anyone about this painful part of my life... but it sucks... u noe wat... even my family is used to it... whenever i hit..i will scream of course and all they say is wat happen?? and then ignore!!! hahahah they dun bother alreadeee....
Tat's why my little toe abit cacat.. hehehe....

okie.. take care fazilah!! may u never hit anything else!!!

enjoy!

WAT A DAY~!

Today went skool for pbl meeting... my groupmates are super crazy people...and obviusly funny ppl esp kumari.. haiz...luff non stop... but yeah hopefully our pbl is the one that george jacob looking for... oh then went bowling wit the malay peepz..

i sux at the game!!! hahahah as usual... but it's fun :)

went to csc farrer park there.. PLANET BOWL

Onlee manage to snap 2 photoz with miss raniah and mr rashidi. The Rs'!!!

Yesterday went out with him to marina square and bedok corner.. snap a few shots..i will post it up soon :)
had a long and draggy quarrel..but i speak wat's in my mind and all.. so now eveerything is clear alreadi... We will give it another try~!!! hopefully for the better now. Tired of everything.

Been enjoying myself for these 2 days.. haiz... back to assignments and studyin!!!!

can't slack!!! sobz sobz

Crying Nite 4 me

Just watch tentang dia. sad sia.
Poor guy and rudi.. coz of that stupid girl.
It's true tat if u are sad..there will be no room for happiness.
u are either happy or sad.
And tat reminds me..before i watch this show i watched singh is kinng.wahahha and the hero name is HAPPY SINGH.
Aniwae.. i think one should appreciate wat one have especially me. I need to remind myself this. Hhahaha. I have to live my life to the fullest.

If u think too much and think deeply abt everything and analyse stuffs and all...it onlee makes u depressed and confused. Just go with the flow. Learnt my lesson alreadee :)

The moral of the story is be happy.

Jalan raya

Today went jln raya again... hmmph 7 houses.. starting from pasir ris...down to kallang.. bridge road.. bukit batok and woodlands... love all the food.

Just finish watchin Sivaji. Damn shiok. Actuallie watched in theatre last year already. Then in the afternoon watched muthu!!! damn sad. I will always cry at the same part every time i watched the show. The oart whereby Rajinikanth will leave his place and the mom came...

Aniwae ya.. now studying maths.. haiz... last minute sia... Thanks to all the projectz taht is due this week... haiz haiz haiz...

Aniwae now the only song that is stuck in my head is akon new song. Finding for the vid but unfortunately they didn't have yet. So i can only get this from you-tube.

Enjoy the song!

mixxture

Today I was supposed to go to town with Mother.
Due to some circumstances, it was cancelled.
Kinda disappointed.

Studied Maths. No mood. Stop. Studied English. No moood. Stop.
Guess my peak period for my brain to work is after 10 pm.
WHich is like soon~~!!!

Along's friends came. Mom was unhappy and angry. haiz.

Now cik zaiton came with her funny and humourous hubby.

Quarrelled with him. SIANZ... when will all these shitty stuff stop.

Make me luff people. GOona watch exorcist again. FORCED BY MY SISTER!!
tatta~!

Raya wit HIM~!!!

Black.

He went my place and i went to his place. Quite rushing coz i ended late. tak sempat to take proper photos. These are the only ones we can sempat ambik. sobz sobz.

Watch klakar rabak at his place!! damn funny.

hehehhe..

Actually my mood was not that good coz feeling unwell. mentally and physically drained. Should i go KK? hmmph maybe i should. friends adviced me to go and have check-up. haiz. afraid of the truth. but i'm totally drained out. abnormal me. thankfully he understand my problem and accept me for who i am :) maybe that's why i am still attached to him. i noe a bit unfair for him. he can find better and healthier women out there unlike me.

Aniwae back to jalan raya thingy. was okay but like i say rushing. mad rush. hahahaha.

I succeeded

In the end i made a big hoo-hah and i coould go!!!
YIPPIE~!!!!
Sometimes u just got to do what u got to do :)

Dreaded..
Alot of work undone.
Sianz. Super sianz.

Will finish up ed psych 2 my part and essay outline
Reconstruction
ANd hopefully dyslexia..
And ICT...
HAiz.. Haiz/.. Haiz....

Going home!!
yea!!!

Is it me?

Hari raya. People are supposed to enjoy and have fun visiting people and eating all the kuih raya and be kecoh kecoh. But those who have lost their loved ones recently, they are unable to celebrate with much happiness. Just like me a few years ago. It was a sad month for us indeed.
This yearmy grandma is unwell. She suffered from a terrible back pain as her bones are very fragile. As usual 1st week of raya we didn't go visiting. Instead they visited us coz my grandma is the oldest compared to the other older granduncles and grandaunts.
I was really looking forward to 2nd week of raya on sunday. Which is like tml!!! i get to wear the new red baju raya and go to my aunt's place and like go visiting one whole day. Though it will be very tiring but the atmosphere and the kecoh kecoh raya is there. As i came home ffrom school daily, i would always see friends and families wearing baju kurung and the smiles on their faces. Envious me. SO i was REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SUNDAY where it will be my turned!!

BUT~~~~~~~~~i was really sad when i overheard my mom conversation with my fav aunt.
it's in malay.
"hari minggu, aku, farah kau dan osman nanti jalan raya. Biar Fauziah and Fazilah jaga mak kat rumah. Jadi kite boleh naik satu teksi."
This mean that my mom, my fav aunt, farah(my younger sis) and my dad will be going visiting but me and my elder sister hve to stay at home and take care of my grandma. I was sad. I mean for the first time i can really feel that i am outcast. My elder sis dun care coz she will have the chance to go jalan raya with all her friends and she got like more than 2 grps of friends. WHEREAS for me, i have limited friends here and there. Lucky this year got NIE jalan raya. TAT's all. My bf is just a simple visit. jamilah will jjust pop by her place. I have like no proper visiting day. I really want to experience again the joyness of hari raya which i have not experience yet after my granpa's death. Last year during ray my mom felt sick. This year my nenek is sick.

So the moral of the story is tat i'm pissed coz my mom ask me to stay at home to jage my nenek. so tat means my hari raya this year i only go to one house that is my paternal nenek.
Pathetic. Being a middle child is difficult. They heck care abt u. Gaininng their attention is difficult.
They will always ask us to give in..no matter wat..
I tried to be involved with my family. I always try to talk to them about wat happen in skool and life. but i noe they heck care. They just listen to my nonsense coz it is courtesy. u noe y?? twice while i was talking to my mom, she suddenly changed topic and talk to my nenek even though i haven finish my story. From then i knew they did not take me seriously. They used to call me pekak and gemuk. I noe they are teasing me but one period of time they keep calling me and insulting me pekak and gemuk. I mean as a family u shouldn't say all these things.
Am i too sensitive? but to think of it i'm okay if u like call me once or twice..but imagine everyday and everytime u can't catch wat they are talking about, they will say kau memang pekak aper.. that hapen quite sometime ago. now it's better. maybe coz i have my bf. so they accepted the fact that i am abit more mature. i learn a valuable lesson: dun give birth to odd numbered kids except 1.

If i succeeded to become a teacher one fine day, i will not let my students feel outcast. i will sincerely listen to their problems and make them feel belonged.

Random

Random.

In the middle of studying MATHS CHPT 4.
Actually i was suppose to do my ed psych essay which due in 2 weeks time but i just feel like doing maths:)
Now is the time when my brain in the pit stop. So many things to do~! It's not that i am complaining about the work but it's just tat there is no freaking time!!!
Miss raniah! tml she will be back!! she was down with fever.

Today he was so sweet. He came down to fetch me after work as he start in the afternoon the nest day. so we went vivo!! treated him to earl swensen :) personnally i prefer the normal swensen coz there's alot of variety esp the pasta. FOr earl swensen, i think the specialty is the steak. Different kind of steak. few varieties. But more expensive though. I guess it is because they use nicer plates and better service. The plain water is served in a glass..like a wine glass. Next time i will go there again for the steak..Average price 23 bucks for one piece of meat!!! hahahahax..Aniwae it's kinda romantic coz we sat beside the glass panel and the view is at the sea there. There is blue lighting too. I guess we went at the correct time.. evening from 645 to 730. around that time.
It's the most ever romantic dinner for me :) maybe for him too.. but hu cares?? hehehhe.. oh ya they should have candle light.. next time for those couple who will be going to earl swensen.. bring your own candle!!! :) it will complete your nite.

here's some snap we took :)

The picturez

Enjoy the photoz!!!
i love them~!!!
so u must too~~!!!!

slamat hari raya!

Today was not good.. but great!!!
I mean qute havoc and hectic at my both nenek place. But our maternal nenek is not well. She got some back problem and it is really sad to see her stand up or sit down coz she will have the painful expression.
I'm afraid.
By the way she is 88 this year!! bravo!
Will upload the photoz real soon!!!!!!!!

BUT NOW i'm pissed off!!! i'm F***ing Pissed!!!!!!
Shit man!!!! I guess i deserve all that for being a naughty girl.
I JUST HATE IT when someone do that to somebody.
that somebody will feel like a nobody because of that someone!!!!!!!!!(hate it!!)

wordz of advice: dun trust anyone even yourself!!!