Unrest

Missing someone..what does it mean?
Blood related love and missin each other is one of them.
Friends and close friends we seldom meet up...
Bestfriend (aint got one animore) kinda miss
A crush coz its once in a while we get to see.

But what i am experiencing now is driving me nutz!! I haven miss someone so badly before for weeks and months!! I kept it to myself because i feel stupid. U noe why... coz  we two are always together... 5 days a week u can say... what made me bonkers is that just now... after saying goodbye... i missed him already...as in i want to see the face again. It driving me nuts!! He is not even my bf! And yes i am not even in love with him because he has made it clear and my walls are high up.

So i am.not sure how i can miss the person badly.. i always thought it is freaking lame esp couples to miss each them when they see them often.. but when it happen to u.. shit just got real... i thought it was kinda like a habit but it will die off soon.. but not in this case...
Missin someone means..(for me) u yearn to see that person.. things u do will remind me of that person..that person basically in ur mind 24 hrs..
Creepy yes... i feel like i am an obsessive friend... i am.not like tat.. as i think.abt my past... it wasnt like these... omg.. is it my age... i am freakin out rite now..
To be practical...i keep myself occupied...and God is on my side.. he is gg for a small pilgrimage and it will be like for 2 to 3 weeks... hopefully i wont go insane.. so i am takin this period to see how psychotic i am...hahahha! If i manage not to think abt him for atleast 1 week.. i am normal and we are brothers for life! If not... i need to take a step back and reflect and build my walls thicker and higher... afterall i am still a girl (heart will always take control) ... i can do this girl!!! Will never repeat the same mistake.

But i guess after losing my bestie...he is always there for me...he never fails to leave me alone... no one does that before...and that is why i am.also too reliant on him also... i would really love to have him.as my bestie.. and i think i will be the luckiest girl ever :)

It was nice while it lasted

It was sad..  abrupt farewell.. maybe it was good..  the sadness will disappear quickly... my last paper is tmr.. and cmg to school to study is not a nice feelin animore. Miss him more than usual. Gosh... wat is suckier is that he will be graduatin already and why the hell did i ever meet him!!! Why cant i meet him earlier?? Or why i have to meet him... maybe tats okay.. why do i have to finally fall for him!! 16 days straight with him..  and i have to fall for him on the last few days for things that he did for me. Haiyoh!!!! Tat is why sometimes i really have bad luck with guys...should i turn to my old ways???? Hahaah!! Naah! A sin!  Okay k my nex plan i am gonna thank riduan for being my study mate! And life moves on.

Listen

Antisocial... naah never... but been pluckin in my earpiece because the voice and luffter is my distraction.. afraid to fall deeper... thus the antisosialnesss.. #cannotaffordmyhearttodriftandmakestupiddecisions

Goodbye

Not lookin forward to monday.... tat will be it....saying goodbye wont be easy

Missing

Studyin for exam... been spendin days...
First time i have no mood coz maybe u r not there :(

-we are not alone-